Golden Brown Fox by Ty Williams

Children’s books? I am a huge fan.

I love how allegorical tales can make a point so much more directly than just saying: don’t put your hand in the fire (or whatever).

I guess that’s why mythologies exist in the first place: a story about how you should plan things properly or your wings will melt when you fly too close to the sun is much more interesting than being told to plan things properly or you will (boooooring) fail.

My favourite ever children’s book is The Little Prince. I first read it in French class at school. I only wish I had understood at 15 some of the wise bits from it that  I think I understand now. For example, the bit about the Little Prince taming his fox:

‘Who are you?’ said the little prince. ‘You’re very pretty.’

‘I’m a fox,’ said the fox.

‘Come and play with me,’ suggested the little prince. ‘I am terribly sad.’

‘I can’t play with you,’ said the fox. ‘I am not tame.’

‘Oh! I beg your pardon,’ said the little prince.

Then, after a moment’s thought, he added:

‘What does “tame” mean?’

‘You are not from these parts,’ said the fox. ‘What are you looking for?’

‘I’m looking for people. What does “tame” mean?’

‘People,’ said the fox, ‘they have guns, and they hunt. It’s a great nuisance! They also raise chickens. That is the only interesting thing about them. Are you looking for chickens?’

‘No,’ said the little prince. ‘I am looking for friends. What does “tame” mean?’

‘Something that is frequently neglected,’ said the fox. ‘It means “to create ties”.’

‘To create ties?’

‘Precisely,’ said the fox. ‘To me, you are still only a small boy, just like a hundred thousand other small boys. And I have no need of you. And you in turn have no need of me. To you, I’m just a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you shall be unique in the world. To you, I shall be unique in the world.’

And, a bit later in the conversation:

‘My life is very monotonous. I run after chickens, the men run after me. All the chickens are the same; all the men are the same. Consequently, I get a little bored. But if you tame me, my days will be as if filled with sunlight. I shall know the sound of a footstep different from all the rest. Other steps make me run to earth. Yours will call me out of my foxhole, like music.’

‘Please,’ he said, ‘tame me!’

Don’t we all want to create ties with others?

To know the sound of a footstep that we trust?

To find people to whom we are unique in the world?

Thing is, as the fox later illustrates when he is teaching the Prince how to tame him, taming requires patience. You have to show up, over and over again. Preferably at the same time, so the fox can groom his heart for you. You have to look out of the corner of your eye, so as not to scare the fox away. You have to sit just a little closer every time. And you have to be careful with the words you use, because words can create so much hurt.

It sounds like so much work.

I’ve done a lot of fox taming the last few years: I needed new friends in my new country! And I have behaved like a wild fox a fair amount too. Turns out people need to approach ME carefully too, not look me full in the face until I trust them, and be cautious with their words.

I’ve tamed some people, and they have tamed me. Some people, I scared away. Some scared me away. Some people, we are still taming each other. It can be so exhausting. But would I have it any other way? Hell no. And when things get shaky, I often come back to this little tale of the fox and the boy and reflect on whether I have been observing the rules of fox taming properly.

Do you have any fox-taming tales to tell?

Oh, and if there are other freakishly wise kids books you think I should read, let me know!

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